Nightmare on Elm Street Reboot: Freddy at His Wit's End

Everybody’s favorite nightmare, Freddy Krueger is coming back to the big screen, according to recent reports by New Line. David Leslie Johnson (“The Walking Dead”) is writing the “Nightmare on Elm Street” script.

This will be the second reboot of the 1984 horror movie, after Platinum Dunes, Michael Bay’s production company, took a stab at it in 2010 to a lukewarm reception. Whether it was Rooney Mara’s lack of enthusiasm or entrusting an unknown director to helm a boring horror film, it never transpired to a movie series despite doing decent enough at the box office. Which was sad, because Jackie Earle Haley could have done something great with Freddy.

                Some are already giving ideas on how to perfect the monster icon. From the basic “what made the original great” to the common slasher movie complaint “can we get believable-looking teens?” The same can be said for any horror reboot. This list takes it a step further, suggesting that Krueger should “ditch” the jokester. But do we really want Krueger to lose his funny bone?

                This question could actually keep me up at night, spoonful of coffee grounds in my Coke can. Sure Krueger was more a silent killer (not like Jason or Michael Myers) in the original, though he sure took joy in his work, filling the darkness with his dry laugh. His comedy side only showed when he told Nancy he was her boyfriend now and stuck his tongue down her throat.

His comedy routine didn’t fully bloom until the third nightmare “Dream Warriors”. At first he was the anti-hero archetype usually found in 80s action movies, cheeky one-liners like “Welcome to prime-time, bitch” as he shoves the girls head in the television. As the series progressed he became more clownish, even to the point of wearing a Nintendo Power Glove and bragging that he “beat [his] best score” after killing poor Franklin.

            And that bitter taste has stayed in some horror fans’ mouths since. “Freddy vs. Jason” made it worse, while the reboot had us clamoring for the originals. Does that mean we should abandon one of his trademarks? The one that truly sets him apart from the rest? Jason’s got his hockey mask and machete; Michael Myers wears an indistinguishable William Shatner mask; Freddy’s got the sweater and hat, wears a glove with knives and kills you in your dreams. But his best signature has always been his humor, a sadist that enjoys slaying his snarky teenagers with a hint of sarcasm.

Plus moviegoers love a scary film with plenty of laughs. “You’re Next” was a surprise hit because the absurdity and arrogance of the family made people laugh, “Cabin in the Woods” was made with horror movie fans in mind with jokes and playful jabs at the genre. “Ash vs Evil Dead” premier is just around the corner, and it seems the gore will only slightly surpass Bruce Campbell’s humor.

As an avid “Nightmare on Elm Street” fan that saw the reboot in theaters twice because I wanted it to be good so badly, I fully support bringing another Freddy Krueger to the big screen. But if they neuter Krueger to be as dumb and stupid as his peers, just because it makes him seem darker or edgier, count me out. Cause then he’s just another boring vengeful boogeyman with a troubled past, and we already have plenty of those.